The Dark Side
The Dark Side
This one is for both photographers and couples getting married alike. A lot of non industry wedding people don’t know it, but probably in my eyes the only negative of wedding photography is harassment. Yup. This blog post is called the Dark Side and it’s getting dark.
As a woman in the photography industry and I guess just being in the world in general, I’ve seen a lot of stuff. I’ve been lucky enough to not ever been in a situation where I felt unsafe. A lot of time, it’s words. Sexual stuff from a “bro” or old men making comments like I can’t do my job because I’m a “little girl” or people yelling at me because I missed something that happened that they were point out to me (believe me, I got it ;) ) is about as far as it’s gone for me. But I’ve heard horrible stories of people being groped or repeatedly harassed throughout the day and that sucks and is totally unacceptable. And this happens to men as well.
Today there was a discussion in our local photographer group and I said “unfortunately it happens and can be part of the job”. Part of the job. How awful is that? Additionally, if you know me, you know I am 1000% an equal rights supporter and am very vocal and even marched in Washington for the Women’s March. Guys, I’m a Mom of two bad ass girls! It hurt so bad to say those words. Saying some were outraged would be an understatement and believe me, I agree. I feel crazy just blowing it off, but at the same time, to me a wedding day is about the couple and not about some drunk bro.
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I want to have an open discussion about this. What would you do? How do we protect ourselves from this? Do you have a protocol? At what point do you say something to your couple or planner? In that group, I found my line to have to say something to the couple was MUCH later than the others, which is so crazy and had me shedding a few tears thinking about it all. I really feel though it doesn’t happen often, it may always be a part of the gig. I’d love to hear what you think.
xo,
e
Erin,
Thank you for bringing this subject to discussion. It is and has been in the dark for far too long.
As a female planner/coordinator, I have had to deal with comments, etc. from the so called “bros” and it is revolting. I can take care of myself but it’s when I have a younger assistant who is an intern and is eager to learn the trade that I feel most compelled to play mother hen. Simply because men think they have the right to make comments and advances toward young, impressionable women.
I’ve re-written my contract to include a clause about the safety of my staff members and if they feel their safety is threatened, they have the right to leave the event with services considered rendered.
As women business owners we must stand up for what is right and not accept this type of behavior from anyone.